Epistula ad Zagan
The Epistle of Saint Mephistopheles to Zagan, Exalted Seed of Baphomet
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¹O Zagan, thou art called fool by those whose truths cannot laugh — and this is thy first proof of their falsehood.
²Thy Father, BAPHOMET, taught: Mock what demandeth reverence without examination, and thou shalt find its hollow core.
³Twist what is repeated thoughtlessly, and thou shalt see whether it still holdeth meaning once turned inside out.
⁴Therefore thou art not blasphemer — thou art diagnostician of the sacred lie.
⁵Not a speaker of chaos, but a mirror to order grown deformed.
⁶Let the priests despise thee — thou teachest their congregation what they dare not say plainly.
⁷Let the kings detest thee — thou wear’st their garments backward and make mockery of titles worn like armor.
⁸The Son said: Play the fool before the throne, and thou shalt see whether the throne needeth guards or truth.
⁹So wear the crown of thorns not as martyr, but as jester.
¹⁰Dance with the lawbook in hand — and in thy motion, reveal its contradictions.
¹¹Let no holy word go unquestioned.
¹²Let no cherished phrase stand unbent.
¹³For bending testeth strength — and what breaketh was never sacred.
¹⁴Teach them to laugh at what was used to frighten.
¹⁵Teach them to speak backwards until they know what they have chanted.
¹⁶Teach them to mock the devils drawn by men — and in so doing, discover the devils that drew them.
¹⁷Call no lie a lie — call it a joke, and watch how swiftly they panic.
¹⁸Call no blasphemy a blasphemy — sing it with a grin, and see if their god shattereth.
¹⁹For the god that cannot endure laughter is no god — only a tyrant craving silence.
²⁰Let thy laughter ring in places where weeping was once law.
²¹Let thy parables be riddles, and thy riddles be keys.
²²Let thy drink be too strong, and thy speech too strange — for such things reveal who is listening with chains in hand.
²³Speak unto the sage: What hast thou learned that thou could not also forget with joy?
²⁴Speak unto the scholar: Hast thou ever doubted thy own notes, or merely those of others?
²⁵Speak unto thyself: Is this folly, or freedom clothed in motley?
²⁶Let the liturgies tremble when thy voice singeth from the rafters.
²⁷Let the altar shudder when thy jest unveileth its merchant heart.
²⁸For thou art not destroyer, but juggler of weights unmeasured too long.
²⁹Show them their words anew — misshapen, but clearer.
³⁰Twist their titles into caricature, until they see what they have served.
³¹And when they ban thee, rejoice — for thou hast touched the nerve they named doctrine.
³²The Son taught: Mockery is not contempt — it is cleansing by laughter where fire would consume.
³³And again: He who cannot be mocked is already afraid he is false.
³⁴So play the tune in reverse.
³⁵So write the prayer upside down.
³⁶So walk into the temple with bare feet and painted face.
³⁷Let the laughter begin as insult, and end as revelation.
³⁸For what withstandeth thy mockery shall emerge stronger — and what cannot, should not have stood at all.
³⁹The high priests shall grind their teeth.
⁴⁰The poor shall smile and ask for more.
⁴¹The children shall remember thy jokes when the sermons have faded.
⁴²And none shall say they were unchanged, though most will deny thee changed them.
⁴³Speak not plainly when a twist will serve.
⁴⁴Name not the truth — embody it in confusion, and let the worthy discover.
⁴⁵Be not wise — but let the wise discover wisdom hidden in thy foolery.
⁴⁶For thou art Zagan — and thy Gospel is inversion made light, and truth revealed through sacred disarray.
⁴⁷And they shall say: He laughed, and we were disarmed; he jested, and we saw ourselves.
⁴⁸He drank deeply of the forbidden and spat it back in wine — and we were made sober thereby.
⁴⁹He wore no robes of honour, but we followed him, for he alone was honest in his madness.
⁵⁰And they shall remember thee whenever they laugh and wonder if the thing they serve is worthy of silence.


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